::the adoption taboo::

"Wow, I'm so surprised with how open you guys are about your adoption process."

"Oh, you're adopting... why? Can't have your own kids?" 

"Why are you adopting?"

"Have you tried other methods to conceive?" 

-------------------------

We have come to the realization that there is some kind of negative stigmatization associated with "adoption" and we do not understand why it is such a taboo subject. The inability for a woman to have a child or a couple's infertilty is perceived as a terrible thing in our society. Our world is evolving everyday and some of our cultural and social beliefs should be re-examined. With a negative stigma, it is no wonder adoption is kept a secret and hardly considered by many couples.

The biggest question is, what is so wrong about adoption? The issue with childlessness.

do issues around childlessness

We have discussed this taboo with close friends (to clarify, they are truly supportive and very excited with our adoption) and there is a sense of "great importance" with family name and heritage being passed on from generation to generation... but, there are an estimated 153 million orphans out there waiting for a family. An adoption shouldn't be labeled as a "last resort" because of the inability of having children. Brian and I perceive this journey as a new path in our lives and that a child out there is destined to be with us. Every child needs love. Every child deserves love.

We are embracing our whole adoption experience. We are open with our adoption journey for two major reasons: for one, to share our awesome experience! This process is the same as pregnancy... like when our dream gets closer to coming true, our heart grows and grows with each step of the way.  Secondly, to educate others who are curious about the adoption process. This is a win-win situation for us. We even got some people coming to us expressing their positive, genuine questions regarding the adoption process. Some women came up to Brooke expressing their frustrations that they felt alone in their struggles with conceiving and had no one else to talk about the idea of adopting. We think it's important to share that no one is alone in this process and that they should be able to discuss about adoption without feeling that adoption shouldn't be discussed openly. We are up for a genuine discussion. We certainly have faced some interesting questions from our "acquaintances"... we expected to face personal questions along the way- but there are also those who should learn the do's and don'ts about asking.

So, here we are blogging about this issue. An adoption isn't commonly talked about. Not everyone can relate to the adoption experience. We get it. We would be lying if we said that it has been a smooth, perfect ride for us.  In fact it has been an emotional roller coaster for us. However, our support for each other has kept us going and that is the most important. :)

An update about our first home study interview last Thursday, it went well! It was a very casual interview. We met up at a local coffee shop for our couples interview with our social worker, Leslie. We will have another meeting on November 1st, where we'll do our individual interviews and home inspection. Child-proofing .. or something close to it!  Our niece, Alia, definitely helped with the child proofing part so there's a little left to do. :)  We also need to get most of our paperwork done by then. We've arranged to have doctor appointments next week to get our medical paperwork signed and verify that we are in good health. Financial documents need to put together, as well. We, seriously, cannot wait to wrap up our home study! It has been going rather quicker than anticipated! Yay!    

oxox, 

Brooke & Brian

we find out that adoption is such a big deal after all, especially in our society.  So why is adoption a big deal?  Why is such a taboo?  Why do issues around childlessness come to define a woman’s position in her family and even her self-esteem? The inability of a woman to have a child is seen as a terrible thing in our society.  - See more at: http://www.genevieveng.com/adoption-a-taboo-for-our-times/#sthash.9HHJLzs1.dpuf

we find out that adoption is such a big deal after all, especially in our society.  So why is adoption a big deal?  Why is such a taboo?  Why do issues around childlessness come to define a woman’s position in her family and even her self-esteem? The inability of a woman to have a child is seen as a terrible thing in our society.  - See more at: http://www.genevieveng.com/adoption-a-taboo-for-our-times/#sthash.9HHJLzs1.dpuf

we find out that adoption is such a big deal after all, especially in our society.  So why is adoption a big deal?  Why is such a taboo?  Why do issues around childlessness come to define a woman’s position in her family and even her self-esteem? The inability of a woman to have a child is seen as a terrible thing in our society.  - See more at: http://www.genevieveng.com/adoption-a-taboo-for-our-times/#sthash.9HHJLzs1.dpuf

::tutorial for wearing an infinity scarf::

I (Brooke) want to share this simple video for those who ordered the infinity scarves about how to use the scarves properly because some of you asked me, "how do I wear this?" No worries! The video is self-explanatory. (yes... that's Lo in the background...) All scarves I've made are ironed out for convenient packaging reasons; thus, you need to pull two sides apart to become tube-like to fluff up the infinity scarf.  Please do not wear them "flattened out" like when you get the scarf in the package. :)  You could even wash them to fluff them up, too. 

Thank you again for your generous support! ox.

::adoption fund progress::

What a week(end)!

We hosted our adoption fundraiser at our school's homecoming event over the weekend and it was a  hit! We received a generous donation from Jamba Juice with three different flavored smoothies to sell at the event.. with 100% of the proceeds going towards our adoption. We were truly blessed to have their help. With extra hands, Brian's mother flew in for the weekend to help us with the adoption fundraiser and also helped out with the new batch of autumnal scarves (and sew them all!) to sell at our booth. Brooke's mother also made 24 scarves of our school colors, which was in very high demand from the TSD community! Thank you, moms (Irene & Patty) for your AWESOME and GENEROUS help! We earned +$2,000 bucks from this awesome event!

 

 

We also want to recognize our generous friends (Jessica, Fallon, Pia, Erin, & Sarah) who came over for a craft party to help Brooke make scarves and necklaces for the homecoming event, too! The craft party was fun, especially after being served mimosas! :)

Infinity scarves are really hot and trending right now, we are currently working on a special order of scarves for a sorority, Alpha Sigma Alpha. Special thanks to Rachella Shepard and her sorority sisters for contributing to our adoption fund! For you sororities/organizations out there, please contact us if you are interested in ordering scarves for a great cause!

Ground to Cup Coffee is now selling autumnal flavors: Pumpkin Spice and Pumpkin Creme Brulee! They make great gifts for friends & families... (hint hint: Thanksgiving & Christmas is coming up!).

Brooke is currently getting her creative juices flowing to make something new for our Etsy adoption shop. We will keep you posted..

Finally, we are going to meet our social worker this Thursday for our first "interview."  We each had to complete a lengthy autobiography. And in such details!  We are looking forward to the meeting and getting one step closer to bringing our child/ren home :)

Thank you all for your continued support, without your great support, Brian and I would not be where we are in the process. 

::BusyBusyBees::

To update you, we have been really busy, especially since returning to our classrooms after summer break. The first week back is always the busiest and most energy draining time of the year (for all you teachers out there, we feel you!). Both of us have been completely exhausted everyday the past week and a half. Once we get back into a routine, we'll be able to get a lot of the little things done.  Things like getting our fingers printed, completing our autobiographies for our social worker, and getting everything in order for our home study.

Some of you have asked, what exactly is a home study? We learn as we go... 

The home study is a detailed report of .. our lives (basically!) and prepared by an assigned social worker. The entire process can take anywhere from three to six months to complete. The home study requires prospective families like us to compile a bunch of documents, answer questions, and explore our reasons for adopting. Through a series of visits and interviews, the social worker can get a complete picture of who we are and what life is like in the Sipek zoo. So, let's get down to the nitty and gritty... the home study includes:

Autobiography/Family Background: We will have to talk about our family (past and present), how we both perceive discipline, memories from our awesome childhood, etc. We've had discussions about the topic of discipline and it was interesting because we've definitely learned a lot about each other as soon-to-be-parents.  (The same applies to couples who are going through pregnancy.. what types of discipline will be used or not?)

Neighborhood/Community/Schools: Oh yeah, these are also topics we have to discuss with the social worker by explaining what our home community and school system is like. Questions like, "Which school will our child(ren) attend? Are we buddy-buddy with our neighbors? What resources does our community offer to help us parent our soon-to-be adopted child(ren)?" We are sure that we will have everything covered .. but whew...

Physical Health: We have to see our family doctor to give our social worker the green light that we are in excellent health! We cannot have serious health issues that may impede our life expectancy... because, of course, it is preferential that our child(ren) not be left parent-less again! And a bunch of shots, too. How fun.

Financial Statements: This is everyone's favorite part. Who doesn't like to talk about finances? Ha, not everyone, actually. Not us. However, as expected, we are to show that we are able to care for a child with our current income. We'll have to show our pay stubs, income tax returns, debts, savings, insurance coverages, mortgage, life insurance, and that secret money tree in our backyard, blah blah blah.

Criminal Clearances: We will pass this with flying colors! We both are teachers and work very closely with children. Ah, piece of cake! Next!

References: This is interesting. We'll have to ask three family members/close friends to write letters to our social worker about how awesome we are with children and their perceptions on our marriage... but mainly to see how we would be as parents. One only has to look at our happy trio of dogs to see that we'll be awesome parents! 

Interviews: The scariest part. The social worker will put us under those bright interrogation lights asking difficult questions- this will happen with us together and as individuals. This part will be more of a review of our autobiographies, a follow-up of our home walk-through to ensure safety (fire evacuation plans, child safety equipment, etc.), and showing where our child(ren)'s bedroom will be - right next to ours.

This home study process should be a smooth, but lengthy ride for us. We are looking forward to completing this part of the adoption process and moving on to the next.

Last, BUT NOT LEAST, we want to give love to one of our greatest friends, Tate Tullier and his wife, Sarah, for doing these fun adoption photos. We are excited to share the pictures, but here is one of the photos.. for now!

      
Much love, 
Brooke & Brian  

::Tupperware Fundraiser::

Here's a quick note of information regarding one of our new adoption fundraisers via Tupperware at http://order.tupperware.com/pls/htprod_www/home.  Be sure you see our name on the page, The Sipek Family Adoption, to shop for new kitchen essentials and we will receive 40% of your sales for our adoption. :)

 Thank you in advance for your support! 

Brooke & Brian

::Ground To Cup Coffee Fundraiser::

Colombian coffee is often regarded as some of the highest quality coffee in the world. With that being said, we thought this would be a great way to raise extra funds for us to adopt an orphan(s) from Colombia. :)

We just signed up with Ground To Cup Coffee to sell coffee beans, tea bags, smoothies, specialty drinks, and gift boxes. Our fundraiser page is up and running online! We will get 40% of your total order for our adoption. Check it out at: http://www.groundtocupcoffee.com/online-store/merchant.mvc?Store_Code=COFFEE&Screen=PLST&Affiliate=SIPEK

A coffee/drink for a good cause! :) 

OXOX

Brooke & Brian

::our progress::

We want to update you guys regarding our progress. Last week, we filled out our lengthy adoption application plus autobiographies for our adoption agency. We enclosed our $500 application fee for that, too. The board is currently reviewing our application.
 

Yesterday, we submitted applications for our passports! We have been lagging and holding our passport photos for months and finally put them to good use this time! Due to a new passport policy, we weren't allowed to smile for the pictures, but I (Brooke) got away with mine! :)

I had to renew mine because of the name change. When we ordered for multiple certified copies of our marriage and birth certificates, it was a little more complicated than anticipated due to Brooke's surname change. We had to go back and forth with the bank notary in order to verify Brooke's identity.  Just a couple extra steps for me compared to Brian, which was a piece of cake.  Men surely have got it easier, don't they? Yes, they do! :)

As for the passports and certified copies, it came out to approximately $330.00. Thanks for those who purchased infinity scarves and statement necklaces from our Etsy shop, we were able to cover the cost of all that was mentioned above! We have been selling items from the shop quickly! (Special thanks to one of my besties, Shay, for helping me out with the sewing and painting!)

With all the documents, we have everything set for our home study.  I recently spoke with a friend who is in the progress of adopting from Colombia (what a coincidence!) and was given some helpful tips/advice regarding the home study and dossier process. It's nice to have someone to share stories and experiences throughout the adoption journey.

We submitted our story and photo to AdoptTogether.org and they are currently reviewing our file before launching it online. It's a tax-deductible donation website for those who wanted to make a direct donation.

Speaking of fundraising affiliations, we joined April Wade's Created New at http://www.etsy.com/listing/157777159/the-sipek-family-adoption-fundraiser who is selling pretty ruffle scarves to help us raise extra funds. We will get a portion of the proceeds ($10 per scarf). Thanks April!

We are also getting signed up with a coffee company to sell coffee beans to raise extra funds, too! You know us, we are coffee addicts so thought this would be a great way to fund raise. The company also sells tea bags, specialty drinks, smoothies, and gift boxes. We cannot wait to share the information with you once it's up and running!

We will be unveiling new products for our Etsy shop really SOON (like tonight or tomorrow)! Keep your eyes peeled for the next batch of limited edition products! For those who wanted the mint julep and purple pizzazz necklaces to be restocked, it's going to take longer than we anticipated because the special order for a bulk of beads came in the wrong size. We have to return and order the correct sized ones. Please bear with us!

Thank you again for your generous support!!!
Brooke & Brian